What It Is.

Holy guacamole, it has been an insane ride since the end of September, and I am finally getting a chance to open up about it to you all. Let's be honest, I am finally just up to writing at all-- I have been fighting a level of tired I have never known --it's less than, but different from (in a very hard way) the exhaustion of the early days of parenthood and breastfeeding-- and it has made it hard to keep my eyes open at times.

I am learning that this is what being pregnant with a baby-turning-toddler is.

It's a fast road... really. Time has literally flown since we got our BFP. When I was pregnant with Gabriel, time crawled. I was not working full-time so I literally almost slept through my first trimester (apparently pregnancy makes me extremely tired), but the weeks went by so slowly for me.

And I guess it makes sense-- I was pregnant for the first time. Every little part of the experience, every office visit, every test, every page of the books, every entry on the online pregnancy boards... they were new to me. I was restless to show, restless to feel the baby move, restless to meet our little baby.

And this time? I'm chasing Gabriel around the house, rushing to work, making sure Gabe eats a healthy meal even if I don't cook dinner (let's be clear here- my morning sickness is wicked), and trying to keep our home in order. My husband has been amazing at helping more than ever, and he has been changing Gabe's poopie diapers whenever he can (I am gagging so badly from them, I don't even believe it. I never even blinked an eye when swishing a prefold caked in peanut butter poop until now.)

Honestly, this pregnancy, I would be happy for time to pass slowly, savoring my time carrying Gabriel and relishing the straight eight hours of sleep I can get every night.

But time is flying. And I am hoping I don't wake up tomorrow morning to find it's already May...